And the winner is...

So this morning I have several things that I'm trying to choose to write about. But, the winner is going to be about potty training (well, actually poop). For those of you who really know me, you know how much we LOVE poop at our house. It's an everyday issue...some days greater than others. I don't have much of a choice with three males in the house...there's always farting, pooping, or talking about farting and pooping. "B" has been using the bathroom on his own now for 3 weeks. Most days he's excellent at it, but for some reason this past week has been a nightmare. If you ask me, it's pure LAZINESS. He's a male, duh! He will stop two feet from the bathroom and fire away on the hallway carpet. The response when I ask why..."I had to WEALLY pee mommy." I said, "OK, but you're two feet from your potty, why not just go that extra 4 steps?" As many 3 years would reply, "I don't know". So that ends the conversation until the crying starts because I tell him to go get a towel and clean it up (which he could care less about cleaning it up, it's the fact that he has to miss an extra minute of Lazy Town or Miss Sunny's Spider Patch Friends to do it). That's right...you pee in my floor, you're gonna clean it up. 3 or not! But what I like best is how he has already figured out how to use the potty to his advantage. The first one...I can bet money that every single time he sits in time out, he has to go potty. So I have to let him up because I'm just not sure if he does or not and peeing in the floor or in his pants is just not an option! So, the timer stops, he does his thing (which so far he really does go) and then back to time out we go. He probably figures if he has to take time away from the tv, why not use this time to use the potty as well. Second...I think it's totally amazing that when it's time to clean up toys, a poop attack comes on. Coincidence?? Maybe but I don't think so. I'm pretty sure that he thinks if he goes to poop, then 'ol mom will clean up the rest and he will get out of it...WRONG! So off he goes. I go back to check on him, because I'm forbidden in there and as he strongly says to me every time "Mom, leave, it will stink WEALLY, WEALLY bad." I'm standing outside the closed door so I can go in and clean him up afterwards. If I'm not there, he's off like a bolt of lighting climbing on furniture (eeewww yuck), so I have to drop what I'm doing and head back with him. Once I have been called upon to fulfill my motherly duties, there is ALWAYS the discussion of what his "treasures" look like. Most of the time he tells me (very proudly) that he pooped chocolate chips. "Great job", I tell him. I'm so proud!! My son poops chocolate chips. Wouldn't that make any mother beam with excitement!! Now if I could only get him to "make some money". Third...dinner time. It never fails. We all sit down to a nice, quiet dinner (yeah right) and out of his chair he climbs. So I say (and this is the exact same conversation EVERY single night) " "B" Get back in your chair. But mom, I have to poop". Nice!! Just what I want to do...start eating my dinner only to have to stop, get up, wipe butt, flush the "treasures", wash up, and then return to my plate. Back up in his chair he goes and we all continue as if nothing ever happened! The End